Another mind food. Out of my curiosity, hoping to have an Ah-ha moment again. (I realize Ah-ha moment is quite addictive).
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I occasionally receive a comment like these: “The pain you feel is a valuable lesson” and “You (should) thank all those that love Sashiko”. I feel strange when I receive these, which may be closer to Anger. It is different from the sadness when I encounter shallow understanding of Sashiko.
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Please be noted. I DO thank all who try to respect and care for Sashiko & its culture. However, why in the world do I have to thank those who intentionally (and unintentionally) repaint (damage) what I consider as “my identity”? I would humbly accept this advice if this comes from a person in a similar position such as the Japanese Sashiko artisan who practice Sashiko today. However, no Japanese Sashiko practitioner gives me this kind of “advice”.
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Do you happen to know where the concept “you should thank ◯◯” is from? For me, “Gratitude” is a genuine feeling that comes from me naturally – not something to “do” intentionally by someone telling me to do. Does this also come from the Cultural Difference?
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配信でも語ったのですが、少し追記を。幼い頃の近所の方に「感謝をしなさい」という教えを頂きました。「なんか変だなぁ」とは思いつつも、大人の言うことは聞くものだったので、「頑張って感謝する」ことを意識した時期もあります。今、この「感謝をしなさい」という言葉の語源が微妙にわかったような気がします。英語圏ではよくある教えのようで、「（ごちゃごちゃ言わないで）刺し子をしている人々に感謝をしなさい」というコメントがたまにあります。これにはとても腹が立ちます。実際に刺し子をしている日本人の方から「感謝しなさい」だったら、まだわかるんです（日本人で刺し子をしている人は絶対言わないけど）。でも、日本文化も刺し子も表面をなぞっただけで、見た目だけで刺し子を知った感じになっている人から言われると、「なんだその上から目線は」って思ってしまうんですよね。これも文化の違いなのでしょうか。悪気がないだけに、本当に厄介です。T.S. Eliotの言葉が痛いほど沁みるなぁ。
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2020-08-22 17:14:29
❤️
🌹🌹🌹🌹✌️✌️
Hermoso bordado 👏💙👏💙
Gracias; por tu sencillez 👏👏👏 y ti amor a tu cultura♥️💙💜💚💛
I respect very much your culture and your craft. I am trying to learn to fully understand everything about Saskiko. For instance, Nike has released a couple of sneakers and calling them Sashiko and people who do not fully comprehend it embrace it as Sashiko and for me, I understand and I can see how it can hurt a person as yourself. Who pain stakingly stitches the way you do, hard work, with your heart in it, and they make what is really a copy, a print of the traditional designs. I appreciate the art always, but I feel it is a disrespect. More when one of the parties envolved in the project is Japanese. Why not being from Japan, have the Sashiko done and represented the way it is supposed to be? They are charging over $200 and over $400 for the other pair. They can not justify that they can not expense the true luxury and honor being the work of tru hand craftsmanship at those prices. Recognizing an entire group of talented people and the tradition they maintain. 🙏🏾 Forgive me if anything I say offends with out intent in any context misunderstood thru communication. I mean only to show respect and recognize the talent you have and the beauty behind true Sashiko. 🙏🏾
“I feel strange…which may be closer to anger”. Thank you for helping me understand an emotion I often feel. I am not Japanese but originally from an American subculture, so I feel this way often when I am misunderstood by culture at large. Thank you for telling us what it is like for you. I am grateful to learn the heart and soul of sashiko. 🙂
Thank you for another thoughtful post. I think assimilation could be a factor. When the majority “accepts” something from outside its mainstream it “legitimizes” it to an unfamiliar audience. It often softens that practice or art form or removes it from context. People are rightfully angry when their art/craft is stripped of the meaning and push back. The majority then becomes offended because they view themselves as “helping”. There is an expectation of gratefulness for assimilating a cultures practice. I am sorry people expect you to be happy with misappropriation of your art form.
wow you have put in to words what so many feel about this forced gratitude for those who appreciate what we create. But if one is only appreciating art because they expect the gratitude of the artist have they really shown any appreciation at all?
It’s very interesting how it’s all irregular and folk style.
That concept of ‘you should thank me’ is White Domination and Cultural Appropriation. It comes from the ‘White Dominate’ “culture” believing that their white gaze is what makes your craft ‘real’ and YOU should be thankful that your craft was ‘worthy’ of the White Gaze. That self-centeredness of dominate white culture is where these people who are giving you this ‘advice’ comes from and it is NOT natural or normal. Your continued questioning of these feelings and responses are valuable to help push back against White Dominance as is needs to be checked and repealed for the ridiculousness that it is. (Sorry Atsushi if my language is too much. Thank you for your perseverance)
“You should thank “ for me is a tokenism comment by people who just HAVE to comment .
I think there is usually nothing truely meaningful behind its action apart from the ego.
It’s usually useless and empty comment.
The tokenism would probably be their level of appreciation of the topic too
👌👌😍😍
The suggestion that someone should be thankful for something seems a lot like someone forcing their perspective on to someone else… At the same time, I’m very appreciative of gratitude as something to do, something that sometimes we each need to be reminded of… Gratitude as a practice (like mindfulness) can have great value… It is different from the incidental gratitude that we experience in a more passive way. I don’t believe that real gratitude can ever be forced, but we can choose to find gratitude in our lives as a way of shifting our focus… When I took Tai Chi classes to improve my physical and mental health, the instructor would remind us “That which you focus on increases.” If we choose to focus on gratitude, on finding things to be grateful for, on finding the blessings within the mundane, we will ultimately see the world through a different lens…
I don’t much appreciate when people say “you should be grateful”, either. And I think it is a cultural thing, a sort of sermonizing which is most often expressed when a condescending statement or sentiment was rebuked in some way. I think it’s a cover-up for resentment, anger, feelings of superiority… When someone says to you “you should be grateful” or “you should thank”, they usually mean to imply you’re being impertinent, that you should appreciate your place and be more humble about your position. …Anger is a natural response to such treatment. Though the kill ’em with kindness approach goes a long way! They’re usually very reverent of scripture and sermons and the golden rule and such things. #wwjd #knowitalls #sermonizing. In any case, I think you’re handling it pretty well. #keepitup
i think it invalidates someones emotions when you get a comment like that. it somehow implies your feelings are „wrong“, and in my perception feeling something close to anger is a very relatable reaction to comments like these. instead of listening and trying to understand your perspective, you are „corrected“ – that is so not validating your feelings and perception. it‘s insensitive inappropriate unsolicited advice related to your emotions…