[Personal (Atsushi’s) Note]. I wanted to be someone else. I wished to be someone

[Personal (Atsushi’s) Note]. I wanted to be someone else. I wished to be someone who could “change” the world by big innovations. At some point of my life, however, I realize I wasn’t qualified to be someone who I was longing for. I once hated Sashiko because it seems to be the mere obstacle to “what I wished for” regardless of my capability – I wanted to be someone so-called genius, I guess. ☆
I came back to Sashiko after so many detours. The detours cannot be summarized in one sentence, but the core of my learning is “how to be okay with who I am”. Not everyone is genius, and not everyone needs to be smart to make big innovations. We celebrate diversity, and the diversity is about how to forgive the difference (including the difference between the reality and the dream).
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We try to share the beauty of Sashiko in terms of process (on top of our results). In my childhood, I couldn’t understand at all how one person can keep stitching so much throughout her entire life. It was even scary for me to see her devoting her life into just “stitching”. As much as I loved her, I didn’t want to be like her. It seems spending a whole life with just stitching would be a waste of time. Now I understand how and why. She was “perfectly okay‘ with who she was & appreciated what she had. Her smile is always in my memory calling me “a kid” while her stitching. ☆
After all, words tend to be kind of “cheap”. Therefore, I do Sashiko. However, the words have its own power. Please tell how much you care to someone you care in the ordinary life, hopefully with some handmade stuff. (Literally anything made by hand. Pour the beer to him with your hand. It is the care you have).
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同じ地元出身で、結構長い間ファンとして見続けてきた方と電話で2時間ほどお話。まだ会ったこともないのだけど、でも、地元が一緒で同年代だと、ここまで話ができるのか……と。たぶん昔から、僕は「ヒーロー」になりたかったんだと思うんです。ありきたりに言うと「凄い人」になりたかった。でも今は案外と、「刺し子やってる自分」が一番気楽だったりするのです。言葉では伝えきれないから刺し子をして、でも刺し子じゃ見る人によってイメージが変わるから言葉で表現して。言葉と刺し子。生き様になりそうです。
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2019-04-22 15:24:50

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