Do you have an ideal image that you want to imitate? Do you set clear standards

Do you have an ideal image that you want to imitate? Do you set clear standards when you make a decision to copy what your “ideal image” would do? Some may list renowned & famous successful people. Others may mention a character in movies (like Dwight from the Office). For me, since I had become “independent”, I have one clear image that I am always chasing. I keep saying it here and there… it is the saying: [I am trying to be someone whom I wanted to meet when I was a child].
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I had a pretty rough childhood. I thought that there was no way out when I faced the harsh reality. I wanted to “meet” someone who could “salvage me up”, yet my surroundings were way closed. It looked shiny outside. Inside, not so much. I soaked myself in books to find “someone” instead of looking for someone outside. Naturally, the accumulation of reading “created” the ideal image of whom I wanted to meet in my childhood. Now, I want to be the “someone” to whoever feeling the same way as I did when I needed great help.
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This goal hasn’t changed at all, yet my mindset has changed a bit. I thought I had to be “powerful (successful)” to be “the someone” who can help others. In fact, I can be someone’s help by sharing what I have received: Sashiko. Therefore, I am here, wishing that my words, our Sashiko, and how we approach reality via stitching can be someone’s help. Sashiko is merely “stitching”. For a majority, it is no more than a “hobby”. However, I hope they realize that there are “people who spent all of their lives in Sashiko”.
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先日19日は、妻の誕生日でした。日々妻に似てくる娘と3人で誕生日を祝いつつ、「お母さんのようになりたい」という言葉の最高のプレゼントが飛び出すという、素敵な1日を過ごすことができました。「なりたい誰か」はきっと誰にも存在していて、それは著名人だったり、何かのキャラクターだったり、身近にいる尊敬する人だったり。日々の判断基準がこの「誰か」に準えている人は、やっぱり芯があってカッコいいなと思います。
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私にとってのその「誰か」は、「子供の頃に出会いたかった人」です。苦しかった時に出会えなかった、でも本を読む中で自分で作り上げた「誰か」です。この「誰か」になるためには成功してお金も必要だと昔は思っていたのですが、漸く気がつきました。自分に与えらたことに真摯に向き合うことで私も「誰か」に慣れるんだなと。刺し子を通して、そんな「誰か」になれたらいいなと思っています。
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2023-11-22 00:23:03

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