One of my big challenges in this crisis (paradigm shift period) is to lower my standard. I am a typical perfectionist, and I simply cannot compromise. Does it sound like what I am saying here? Yes, the message on SNS is toward myself as well. I am in the process of learning & changing. ☆
I try to teach my daughter systematically – (unexpected) home schooling. Crafting, Letters, numbers, chores, cooking… and ideally Sashiko. I force her some of what I think she should do, but not Sashiko yet. Logically, I understand it is the best to motivate her by showing what I do – instead of forcing her. But it is SO difficult to practice. ☆
I believe (outside of my idealism/perfectionism), a parent can(should) do what she/he wants. The parents do not have to be the good teachers – what they enjoy & share their joyful activities is already a good lesson… Hahaha, yes, I am convincing myself to be okay with doing what I like in front of her – when I stitch, my mind is not with her, so it is not ideal. Yet, I try to “listen to” her, so my stitching is not as “my preference” as usual. This is probably the original scenery of Sashiko in Japan- a child sitting next to the stitcher. The difference is that the Japanese back then didn’t have “tablet”, and they followed the extremely strict (twisted) discipline. Such an interesting (strange) world we live in. A Origami crane on Sashiko fabric – how can it be more Japanese? ☆ – – – ☆
自宅待機令も4週間を経過すると、それなりに「慣れ」てきます。刺し子をする時は基本的に頭を使いたくない(使えない)ので、あまり娘の前では刺し子をしないようにしてきました。空返事する親にはなりたくないなという理想像と空返事ばかりする現実のギャップが激しくて、さらに空返事を加速する刺し子は、まぁ娘と一緒の時間じゃなくても良いかなと思ってみたり。でも、それも限界なので、「お父さんは少し違う所に頭だけいくからね」と5歳児には(一般的にも)意味不明な言葉を残して刺し子をする時間を作っています。娘と一緒の時間に配信ができないのはこれが理由です。なんだかんだで不器用なんですよねー。 ☆
2020-04-25 10:40:05
Precioso trabajo
It’s wonderful to hear you are teaching her homeskills as well like cooking, cleaning etc. Can imagine there are a lot of kids out there sitting on their bottoms and playing on their tablets.
Never lower your standard; guilt will take hold, and consume you
It’s wonderful that your daughter is able to see your devotion and high standards for your sashiko, even though right now she might not want to do it. Where people run into problems is when they extend their perfectionism into every area of their life, and expect others to do the same. That leads to a lot of frustration and stress for everyone. If you can limit it to your sashiko, you will have less stress
I had to learn the hard way that perfectionism can be harmful. Say it after me: “80% is good enough!”